Miracles

Change can come in many different ways.  Sometimes it presents in an obvious fashion and sometimes it's much more subtle.  If I'm being completely honest with myself and everyone else...then I will admit that I really hoped Jameson would be sitting up this Christmas to open his presents.

When Christmas 2013 hit, he was still so fragile and it wasn't expected. But deep in my mind I thought "well next Christmas he will be holding his head up and sitting for sure!"  February rolled around, I was adamant he would do it. Summer came, we doubled his physical therapy during the week...."he's going to get stronger, one of these days it will just happen!"  By the time the leaves were falling, I knew I'd gotten my hopes up. I could pray and hope for it all I wanted, but in the end, it was up to him and what his body was ready for.

And then something really awesome started to happen around Christmas....Jameson started to giggle. Not just giggle, but communicate with his wide grin and soft gentle voice. I know this is usually something that babies do in the first few months of life, but for us it was a Christmas miracle. To be able to look into your child's eyes after a year and a half of every test and doctors appointment imaginable, and have him smile at you like he knows you love him is indescribable. It's almost like God was listening to my prayers for the last year...but instead of giving me what I thought I wanted, he gave me what he knew I needed.  I can dream all day about Jameson sitting and walking someday, doing all the things that typical kids can do. But what I really needed in my heart and in my soul, was to feel his love and acceptance. To feel like he knows that everything I do and every test and surgery that I put him through is because I love him more than anything in the world.

It was truly a Christmas miracle. :)